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    April 20

    关于这个三国之见龙卸甲

    转贴(部分经个人修改):
    1,这个伟大的影片的伟大的导演李仁港先生,在影片开头的字幕中,赫然写着....原著:李仁港!!!(罗大大,召唤你来自地狱的诅咒.........死者苏生!!!!!!)


    2,撇开赵云投奔刘备时还是个小卒不说,也不说那场夜袭搞得如何,就说之前诸葛大大的出场。首先我提一个问题:诸葛大大是要饭的,还是军师?怎么好像几天没吃东西一样,一出场就顾着吃面条,还要一边吃一边看着那个死人头,还真的挺开胃的!!!(拜托这是军事会议,不是给乞丐派饭)最要命得是吃饱喝足后,说道:“平日不行,但今夜却可以。我算定今夜子时必雷电交加,将有倾盆大雨。”然后感慨的说道:“这个真是天赐良机啊~!”然后拍拍屁股,说句:“此处胜负已定~~”就走了~~(整一个江湖郎中的形象)——到此,我心中诸葛大大温文尔雅,风度翩翩,高深莫测的形象已经被这部影片的编剧先奸后杀,再奸再杀,杀完再奸~~呜呜~~还要自大到自己夸自己(当时我拿着一瓶“美汁源”在喝,一口喷了出来,我的电脑差点为中国的电影事业而献身)


    3,赵云居然为了救罗平安(金宝饰)先和张飞大打出手,关羽先是喊句:“三弟”,让人一看就知道他是去劝架的,谁知一转身就打埋一份,狂汗~~还要刘出来解围(刘备假仁假义,早应该出面制止)还要以身挡枪,如果华仔收枪不及,那就好看咯...话说,当时外面军情十万火急~~~


    4,关张要护送赵云杀开血路去救阿斗,结果刚看到曹军,关说:俺们任务完成了...跑路了....


    5,赵云在曹军中没坚持满3分钟,被打的狼狈不堪,居然抢了曹操的宝剑还不顺手把他干掉....宝剑上写着两字:青缸? 不是.....居然写着:曹操.....(还好可乐瓶没出现)


    6,赵云衣锦还乡...遇到了初恋...皮影艺术家.就这么一面,再想起的时候赵云70多了 (初恋啊 泪奔 -_-!!!) ,这还不算,在人家曹操的辖地(常山),大摇大摆招摇过市,百姓夹道欢迎,还悠哉悠哉的和女友吃烛光晚餐,哇靠!!!这曹操也太厚道了吧


    7,封5虎将的时候马超出来了2秒....猥琐大叔男.....我靠(这就是锦马超?)顺便说下,黄忠的大刀比较象青龙偃月.... 镜头一转,就说挂了——在此,我想颁他们一个奖--“史上最快被秒大奖”


    8,在北伐点将台上,关兴张苞要打架.....诸葛老鬼一脸神秘对赵云说:你就不想留下点美好回忆....喷.... (其他人可以说这句话,但身为蜀国丞相的诸葛亮就不行)


    9,诸葛郎中的锦囊在此充分证明了诸葛亮这个郎中的忽悠,又是青龙白虎两个锦囊,在开战前交给赵云,打开后完全得到反效果,第一个先分裂了赵、关、张(本来兵力就不够还要分兵,分兵不要紧还要赵云去送死),第二个直接把赵、关、张全给废了。狂汗~~~这难道是传说中的锦囊‘秒’计?!!


    10,曹操的孙女就是大手笔啊,拿100匹汗血宝马摆送死"火牛阵"(投石车投就得了)...摆就摆呗,为啥还要韩德骑着去送死呢?(可怜邓芝临死喊着大蜀国万岁...和于荣光大叔的大魏国万岁比嗓门....再次喷... )守城的有连弩不用,冲出去送死。而且那时只有黑火药没有TNT,怎么爆炸效果比美式手雷还强~~~~


    11,最后是曹操孙女,那时候妇女地位低下不可能当官,更不用说做大都督了,就算是曹操孙女也只能沦为政治婚姻的牺牲品,编剧愣是弄了个女都督(可怜赵云一世英名,最后让个小娘们给算计了~~~呜呜~~~赵云大大出来吧!!!活死人的召唤!!!!!!)

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